SO TIRED today! Barely made it through my workout as my legs were giving way, shoulder was sore: UGH. I kept pushing and casually asked my trainer, Sunny, if it was normal to feel cold for an hour or so after my workout (as I have been feeling for the last 3 days of my 40 Days challenge). She said, no and asked if I could to listen to my body and take both Saturday and Sunday off this week. I negotiated a semi-light workout on Saturday and then promised to get into pjs upon my return from an out of town trip on Sunday. When I said NO!, too quickly and too loud, it stopped me in my tracks. What is THAT about? I’m competitive, but sheesh, no need to bite the woman’s head off. Then, the familiar rush of a flashback sensation of being 10 and failing Math–well, not exactly failing. Here’s the story:
Imagine me at 10 years old and in 5th Grade. My teachers are Mrs. Muzilla (Glenn Close-style, edgy and firm, inspiring me to hoop-jump without prompting) and Mr. Jackson (fox-trot divo just far enough away from his All-American days to be fit yet not crotchety enough to be wearing coach shorts with the wide band). For months, I arrived home with a book bag-thump-and-grouse about not doing well in my 5th grade math class. It usually went something like, “Mom, I’m really worried. I suck at Math! I just can’t doooo it!” Mom (by the way, a Math major) remained calm, helped me with my work and stayed positive. I escalated my freakxiety to new heights. It comes time for a teacher-parent conference and I’m positive the news is grim. Mom braces herself and reassures me that, yes, she will ask about the Math grade.
She returns from the meeting–I’m in pieces at this point–and sits down with me. She says she spoke to the teacher and that she’s not sure what I’m worried about. She looked at my score and I was pulling a 93%. What’s the problem? My first reaction was, “so, you don’t think I can do any better?”
Okay, okay, for you psychologically inclined folks, go talk amongst yourself and do your best with this rich material. For the rest of you, here’s why this matters today. I’m still doing this to myself. I set challenging goals (even though I teach students of my Student Success class to go for moderately challenging), and then go quickly into delusional self-criticism when I get overwhelmed. Even when my body is speaking in no uncertain terms, I am deaf to the percentages. So, going public with my overachieving-to-the-point-of-denial self yields this baby step:
I commit to taking BOTH Saturday and Sunday off from workouts and will go light and promise to listen to my body and not push tomorrow. This is huge for me; what would a big step be for you?
Where do you overwork the perfection game? Is it serving you? At what point to you rest?
BODY REPORT:
Today is Day 19 in the 40 days of My Body quest in service to my business and my own path of finishing what I start. I am committed to exercising 6 days/week, keeping a food journal and being more aware of ways I use (and abuse) my body. Going public is extreme, yes, and it’s working!
I am not alone in my 40 Day quest. The roll call is at 18 people (including me)! Some are getting organized, others giving up fast food and some are simply breathing! Support them; check out their sites, give ‘em some good love:
Tanya Geisler–40 days of hatha yoga and suggests that “Serenity. . .starts with a breath.”
Petra Korn–30 days on her body (supported with love by hubby Nick)
Tia Reddy–yoga and exercise.
Alisa Bonsignore–working out and food conscious. Here’s part of her post today: “I think I’ve found my groove, and now it’s time to move on to a more balanced workout.”
Suzie Powanda–no fast food or beverages
Julie Rorrer–training for the Austin marathon in Spring
Emma Alvarez Gibson–some bit of exercise, every day
Joyce Black–21 days without caffeine/general detox; she’s on Day 8 and still rocking!
Carabunga is rocking 40 days of hardcore productivity and rocking a blog about it. My favorite line from yesterday was: “Excuses are wimpy. Accept the truth and use it to move on.” Goooo, Carabunga!
Paula Trucks-Pape and her husband: 87 Days of exploring their passions, who said today, “The 90-100% for others, 70% (or less) for me is a familiar conundrum. Although I know it’s true that the less I give myself, the less I can give others, I allow myself to run on empty far too often.” You are changing, Paula, hang in there.
Monica Kingsbury: 30 days of the Candida diet to deal with her sweet tooth
Jack and LisaMarie Rowell: 30 days of extreme health (alkaline diet)
Diane Sherry Case: 3 weeks of walking
Cindy Morefield: 21 Days of 30 mins/day of cardio exercise
Paula Estes: 30 Days of playing drums
Sheila Hart is IN: 21 Days of no sugar!
Amy Ahlers: 40 days limiting processed food.)
There’s also a whole team of questers assembling in Atlanta, GA as I type. Will reveal them once they are organized.
This is the second video-free day today because I’m having MASSIVE tech difficulties. Will get you some visuals as soon as I can. Thanks for understanding. I did a gnarly workout on the beach with Sunny and SHOCKINGLY resisted the “would you like a sample” devil woman at See’s Candy today. Barely made it out of there. Fyew.
Photo by Keith Marshall. Used with permission under a Creative Commons license.
