you are just going to be a dork sometimes; dig it.

December 27, 2011

in Interviews, Presentation Skills, Video

I had a fantastic conversation with Crystal Reynolds from Crystal Ink.

She said she sometimes feels shy about talking to speakers at conferences or events and asked me if I had any tips for her. Here is how I like my post-stage encounters to go:

Step right up. The way I really like to be approached is for people to just come on up. I want to know how my work impacts people and I don’t necessarily get that feedback all the time. I really want to talk to you after a speech as much as you want to talk to me, and I think most speakers feel the same way. So, tell us how our material affected you, what you got out of it and how you use it. Some of my most interesting collaborations have come from post-talk conversations. You just never know what can happen if you step up.

Don’t be afraid of the emotional … I’m not. My work is intense, and sometimes intimate. I mean, I did a video in my bathrobe, for goodness sake! So, sometimes people approach me from a very emotional place and then get self conscious for having gone “there.” Don’t sweat it. I am not afraid of emotions–they are great guides. I look at my speeches as an experience that we co-created because I took a risk. You witnessed my risk and took a risk of your own. Let’s have our work create a cosmic domino effect of Bright Lights+Hidden Truths=Freedom, which can be emotional, very real and awe inspiring.

You‘re going to dork out sometimes … and that’s ok. We get weird around people we admire–I busted OUT into a nervous stammer-sweat-stand-too-close episode when I met one of my heroes recently. I’ve had experiences where folks did really odd social things like interrupting me in mid-conversation with someone else, and blurting something out, grappling me into a big excited hug before even saying hi (all of which is totally fine–I’m not trying to shame anyone here). Just dork out and embrace that moment. Then, stand back, smooth your clothes down and offer me a hand to shake and say, “Hi, my name is _________. I really love your work.”

So, when have you totally dorked out trying to talk to a speaker or a celebrity or whomever? Tell me in the comments below.


And because dorky moments are worth sharing, copy and paste these Tweets:

Everyone is approachable. @DyanaValentine offers tips for speaking to a speaker.

Did excitement get the best of you? @DyanaValentine says, “Dork out and dig it!”

Step right up to folks you admire. Don’t be shy. @DyanaValentine offers tips for sharing with a speaker.

@DyanaValentine knows that you’re going to dork out sometimes. Just dig it.

  • Dusti Arab

    Oh god. Burst into tears trying to talk to Danielle LaPorte at the World Domination Summit. I was just saying how much her work inspired me and BOOM! Waterworks. To her credit, she was an absolute angel about it. 

  • Kellie Brooks

    Yep, me too. Was less than articulate with Danielle Laporte at RHH LIve. It all sounded good in my head, but my voice had other ideas. When I cross paths with her again, I’ll be much more eloquent. (I hope!) However, I did seek out Simon Sinek afterwards, and was able to be quite present with him. I think the differnce was that I had been looking forward to meeting her for months, and had gotten excited…and with him, it was a spontaneous decision.

  • Shannon

    I dork out around MARTHA BECK. And I can tell by looking at her (and because I read everything she writes) that she does NOT like this kind of attention. But I just can’t help it. I even have a picture of me practically humping her and the look on her face is clearly “aversion,” but I can’t help it! I LOVE HER WORK and she SAVED MY LIFE. So…she’s just going to have to DEAL WITH ME.

    Ha ha. xo love this post cuz I’m a BIG DORK
    shannon falkenstein

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