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From the category archives:

Passion

do you have creator’s remorse?

November 23, 2011

in Around The Internet,Dyana,Internet,Passion,Say What You Mean,Woke Up Knowing

My friend, Melanie Martin posted this on Facebook:
I commented: Great story! It hit me in the belly. I call it “creator's remorse.” It happens for me .every.single.time. I release something into the world or work with a complex client or project. Every.single.time. Here's what I do to treat the malady:
  • Tell the whole story: the situation/set up, what happened next, the result, and the after-result (what I felt like afterwards);
  • Make a list of:

+ Things I'll never do again (never take a client/gig when your gut is telling you to RUN) + Things I could have approached differently + Things that totally surprised me (that I really couldn't have been ready for)

  • Finally, I commit to NOT doing the first, systematizing the second, and praying for the third (well, the good ones, at least).
Three BONUS acts of remorse-prevention (always go for prevention versus treatment, right? Right!)
  1. "CUT IT OUT!" Say it out loud. Voice your complaints once, and then start your next project with those adjustments in mind. Are you doing a crappy job at your job? Then sharpen your craft, take a class or get a mentor.
  2. PLAN time for creator's remorse recovery (including bitchfesting). It's taxing to be seen, to put something out in the world. You suddenly see it as if you are seeing it through 10,000 others’ eyes. You know how different a new boyfriend or girlfriend looks after you've introduced them to your friends? Yeah, like that. So, PLAN for it. Set a walk&talk date with a friend who will listen with a scribe’s ear to hear the things that might actually be useful to you and forgive the gripe-fest parts. Then, listen back to your friend, say, “thank you for listening” and then pat yourself on the back for making art or doing your job or taking the risk to go big and belly flop.
  3. Get a hobby to distract yourself while you come down from post-completion syndrome so you have something to do with your hands besides shovel chocolate covered potato chips (damn you, Trader Joes!).
As for Melanie? Following our Facebook exchange, she had this to say: I think accepting and planning for the fact that I will feel this way will help a lot. I am planning to not dive into the editing straight after the event but mourn a bit for a day and then tackle it because this way I can put some distance between the exhausted “I just shot a wedding” feeling and the dread of looking at the photos. And maybe accepting that all is not as bad as I see it and try to see it through my clients’ eyes will help. Your turn: do you have creator's remorse? What do you do about it? Tell me in the comments, puh-leeze. Thank you. _ _ _ Now share the anti-creator’s remorse love with a friend with these handy pre-made tweets: Know anything about creator's remorse? http://bit.ly/u9FPrk @_melaniemartin and @DyanaValentine do... Creator's remorse usually presents as a bitchfest--what are you doing about it? @DyanaValentine & @_melaniemartin tell here: http://bit.ly/u9FPrk @DyanaValentine and @_melaniemartin suffer from creator’s remorse. Do you? http://bit.ly/u9FPrk +++ Did you know that I'm doing free monthly calls? Well, now you do--so click here and sign up to get the call in info. This month's is this Friday, yes Black Friday. What better time to tune in, listen to a dream and ask your burning questions? Hear you there.

{ 6 comments }

you are HOW you eat

November 21, 2011

in DIY,Interviews,No Talk No Clock,Passion,Say What You Mean,Video

If you can't view this 2:37 video click here. If you dig it and want to see us go even deeper, click here. When my friend, Shelley said, "how you eat tells me something about how you do everything." *Gulp* I suddenly felt vulnerable and nervous. Dive in to this deep interview and let me know HOW you have eaten, related and loved today. Shelley really called me out and raised my eyebrows and taste buds--even though we did this interview about a week ago--I'm STILL setting my mind on "joy" or "calm" or "slow it down" before I take in food or even when I pick up the phone. For those of us celebrating U.S. Thanksgiving, this might be a great week to practice. Oh, and for a juicy, extra special bonus, check out Shelley's new book Tantric Tastes: Dessert For Lovers (affiliate link). Keep life funky and foxy, everyone. Hotlights for those of you who are reading in a rush (please check out the full interview on Shelley's blog here, we had a a lot of fun):
  • Cravings are signals or tools--don't knock them until you've listened to them;
  • If you eat with joy in mind, you digest more effectively;
  • Find out about your body's intelligent ecology (yep, get down on some new BIG words now); and
  • Put some "love ketchup" on your food! Explore your own Spiritual Condiments.
Go beyond, "you are what you eat." Follow Shelley's lead and put some Yippee! on your plate with those mashed potatoes. I'd love to hear your stories about how food impacts your world. Please share in the comments. —– Share the treats; copy and paste these tweets: Sprinkle some Thank You on your food. @DyanaValentine & @eatrelatelove explore http://bit.ly/tbJHT4 #TantricTastes You are HOW you eat watch @DyanaValentine & @eatrelatelove talk about food, work and love http://bit.ly/tbJHT4 #TantricTastes Don’t just eat your pumpkin pie – make sweet love to it! @DyanaValentine & @eatrelatelove http://bit.ly/tbJHT4 #TantricTastes What spiritual condiments r u using on Thanksgiving? @DyanaValentine & @eatrelatelove http://bit.ly/tbJHT4 #TantricTastes

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“I can’t possibly say that” … Or can you?

October 13, 2011

In the wake of her mind-blowingly amazing book called Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves, my awesome friend and coaching colleague, Amy Ahlers, created the Big Fat Lies Summit. I had the distinct honor of taking place in one of this series of fabulous conference calls, which you can check out here. For me—and this [...]

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ever say, “I’m too …”?

October 6, 2011

My fabulous friend, Amy Ahlers, wrote a booty kicking book called Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves. She’s also doing a Big Fat Lies Summit- a series of conference calls where some pretty terrific and insightful human beings (*ahem*, I’m on the list) join Amy to cop to the biggest lies they’ve ever told themselves. [...]

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you’re amazing. love, dyana.

August 2, 2011

The fabulous and crafty Jenny Jafek-Jones wrote a sweet post on her response to the 23 things you might not know about you ebook the brilliant Lisa Baldwin curated. It hits the spot when you need a boost, a lift or a reminder of what you are really, really good at. How about you? What [...]

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your dreams + trust = revolution

July 20, 2011

I have been writing down my dreams for over a year. I feel as though art has returned to my life. It’s a sentimental, possessive experience. Vivid, visual, visceral dreams are a part of me I can count on. Dream time is one of the few spaces/contexts that I don’t question. I don’t judge myself [...]

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is your surly-side keeping anything from you?

June 1, 2011

I went to the beach and made a video. Which are noteworthy because: I live 11 blocks from the ocean and haven’t been in months (okay many months) AND I love video but have been hiding out; These acts mean I’m listening to the Truth; and Because I know I’m better at everything on the [...]

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November 20, 2010

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I also jammed with Nicola on a couple of video-interviews, Nashville-Davidson, Tennessee. Portland, Oregon. San Diego, California. Dallas, Texas. San Antonio, Texas, Without further ado, here are my contributions:

Part 1: The Cosmic Collar Grab

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Part 2: Being Available

Loss Love Life - Part 2: Being Available from the whole self on Vimeo.

Part 3: What Do You Need?

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October 23, 2010

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live where your heart beats hardest
find the wise lifelong teachers
keep motivations simple/real/positive
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live to write a tale or two for the nephews. --Mickey Smith

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October 19, 2010

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